I hate this feeling – this feeling – this same old feeling – of hurt I am going to feel – of the scar to top all scars of feelings of hurt and damage.

It is inevitable, I try and tell myself that, at the age I I have now reached that I will carry the burden of many emotional scars.  Although some are painful, some are beautiful and I try and treasure them like jewels and wear them with pride – but, in my heart I would rather I didn’t have them at all.

What is curious is that, at the venerable age I have now reached  – when I should be comfortable with the knowledge and wisdom that age is supposed to bring, that I dread hurt so much, and am frightened by the pain and how deep it may penetrate.  As a child, I looked up to the members of the older generation and they never seemed to show their pain or fear or anxiety – and yet – now that I am one of them I don’t have their resilience or the ability to hide my feelings.

It is November now and I recall a line from a poem that  my mother would quote “It’s a struggle to get through November” she would say “so little light”.

And yet this year we have had some brilliant days, and I will walk in the early morning light to the top of the hills, where the land becomes wild and free – shedding blankets of fields, duvets of mist and pillows of woods and trees to the valleys below.  And I feel free with the elements and the massive skies above. With the scudding clouds, the wind rushing and the rustlingof the autumnal brown bracken –  I shout for there is no one to hear – except for the few huddled ponies – the only other residents of this open hilltop land that I call mine.  The light is intense and the immensity of the landscape breathtaking.  It lifts my soul and I feel good.

I have an old dog – she has worked this land all around me – she knows every hole in every fence and where to shelter from the wind and how to get home from any direction.  She is an old sheepdog, a working dog – abandoned and living in a hedge when I first came to live here, and I took her in saying I would give her a year of easy living.  It’s been two years now and we have both enjoyed our time together, but her health is deteriorating and she is now going downhill.

 She has one blue eye and one brown.  In her blue eye, I see that light,  freedom and exileration at the top of the hill and in her deep brown eye – uncertainty, anxiety, pain and heaviness.  Tomorrow or the next I will put her down.  I will do it as I think she deserves not to suffer.  I will call the vet out and he will come and we will put her to sleep at home, in her basket after her usual morning walk and a light breakfast, and just when she settles in for a daytime of heavy sleeping, then the vet will  inject her.  But he might as well be injecting me – straight into the heart – into the pain of self loathing, anxiety guilt and hurt.

The Great English Outdoors was asked to provide models and clothes for a charity Fashion Show held at the Swan Hotel in Hay on Wye.  The Fashion Show was held to raise money for the renovation of Hay on Wye’s famous old cheese market.

The Cheese Market in Memorial Square was built in 1840 and had served as a manor court, town hall, council chamber and by a photography club before being left empty.  It is now owned by the Hay on Wye Community Enterprise CIC.

The event was a huge success and the girls paraded down the catwalks wearing pieces from our new Autumn Range of Clothing and previous English Collection  The model in the first image is wearing The English Carriage Coat, on our Classic English designs in black wool, cut on the bias so the coast swings as you move, with a vintage lining, co ordinated with half length Spanish Leather Riding Boots and a hand made Hungarian leather handbag, Wye.  Boudica is wearing her own fur coat!

This model is dressed in our new and exclusively designed luxurious butter cream Organic Silk Shirt, with softly pleated sleeves and over sized floppy collar, topped with our scrumptious Dauphin Waistcoat made from bitter chocolate velvet with covered buttons and vintage lining, accessorised with full length Spanish Leather Riding Bootsand an English Leather Belt and The English Fringed Bag , both made in our workshops.

Here the model is sporting our Horseman’s Poncho, the traditional gaucho style riding poncho,
made from Spanish wool worn with one of our English Fishing Creels (or fishing baskets).  The model is wearing an Hungarian Leather Bracelet on her wrist  and carries a locally made, hand carved Hazel Walking Stick.

I revisited the Burren – last seen some thirty years ago, when I was working in Eire.  It is  a magical unique area of  Ireland  with its own geology, and micro climate, which resembles nowhere else in the British Isles.  It lies in County Clare , and although it is some time s since I saw it last, I had always wanted to return and have time to explore

A surreal limestone plateau with unique climatic conditions,  allowing unusual alpine plants to grow.  This is a harsh,
challenging but inspiring landscape with ring forts, medieval churches and early monasteries scattered around.

The flora and fauna is wonderful too, and it just has you spell bound as you drive around this magical landscape with the soft light falling on pale grey limestone.  Its almost dessert like in its strange beauty.

My God daughter is living in Ireland and together  we packed up my car and topped up with her two small wicked ‘Snippets’ or  Whippets and headed west to County Clare.  The soft rolling green hills of Tipperary gave way to the remarkable grey rocky landscape of the Burren.   Our first stop was Kilmacduagh, a magnificent early 7^th century monastery with a round tower.  Nearby is Lough  Bunny! A permanent Lough on the stony limestone plateau, unlike the many Turloughs  which are dotted over the Burren which fill up with water and empty just as quickly.

On the last night we spent a delightful evening at the Mount Vernon Hotel in New Quay on the north coast of The Burren.  The following morning we headed off with the Snippets  and walking boots, sticks and cameras.  Exploring all over this immense and inspiring landscape, we came across so many ancient churches and monasteries, examples of early Romanesque Irish Architecture like Corcomroe Abbey  with its beautiful early stone carvings.  And then on to the Burren perfumery, situated right in the middle of the National Park.  In the past they used the flowers found in
the surrounding  area to make their perfumes which I remember buying in green glass bottles with a straw basket
round them. They are still making perfumes and aftershaves today and we sell their Man of Arran Aftershave

Next day was spent taking a walk along one of  the Famine Roads which are a poignant reminder of the Potato Famine in Ireland, which depopulated the country by a staggering …… percent..  Exploring deeper into the Burren we passed Burial Chambers and slab tombs, before ending our final leg of the journey at Doolin Village opposite the Arran Islands, where we
did a little shopping, in the end buying a fine jersey from Donegal but not from Arran!  We drove slowly south along the stunning high cliffs of the cliffs of Moher.  We ended our trip at Limerick, arriving in the dark and stopping for the most
unexpectedly delicious meal in the Devlin bar.

My last evening was spent trying to avoid all the ghastly b and b’s touting for business all the way from Waterford, now without its glass works to Rosslare.  By sheer luck, intuition and leaving everything to the last minute, I came upon Killiane
Castle b and b.  Kathleen, the owner  was very welcoming and in a jovial mood.  Whilst getting my very early breakfast the
following morning, as I had forgotten that the clocks had gone back, so got up an hour early, Kathleen explained the reason for good humour, was that the Wexford Opera festival was on and that most of her residents  were loyal customers who had been coming for years.  She pointed to one empty table and said that “this couple have been coming for twenty five  years, and this table by the window for twelve and these two…..then hesitating she said ‘ Well they have been coming
forever…”

I left Eire on that note!
After so long since my last visit it was a joy to return to the area.  And my last night at the Killiane Castle with Katheleen and her long standing opera guests, who kindly allowed one single traveller to join them, made it all very special.

Over 1000 people flocked to Penpont House to visit the Festival of Colour last weekend, and even the weather turned up in style to. This new Festival was conceived by Gavin Hogg of Penpont and Athene English of The Great EnglishOutdoors.

‘We have been totally delighted by the response we have had, it has been a lot of hard work to organise and set up but it has all been justified. We have had visitors from far and wide, and very good local support, and we would like to thank everyone for coming.’

The Festival featured a variety of aspects.

In the Stables Trading stalls specializing in world textiles enthralled visitors with a wide array of unique colourful items. There were talks and exhibits about tribal clothing and customs.

The weekend also included a very interesting range of talks and films, including presentations from John Gillow, Athene English, Ingrid Wagner and Robert Macdonald.

Outside in the grounds, Kate Raggett, Mick Petts, and Simon English, all land artists held workshops and worked on separate pieces of work that unfolded over the weekend to finish with spectacular results

The trees within the grounds also performed with spectacular autumn colour, and were enhanced by a wonderful display of silk flags erected by Shona Watt.

Other workshops featuring Big Knitting, Fabric block printing and basket weaving also took place, occupying adults and children alike for many hours. Along with The Brecknockshire Guild of Spinners and Weavers and Dyers demonstrating their artistry.

New works by Penpont Artists: Robert Macdonald, Tessa Waite, and Morag Colquhoun were also on display.

As one visitor commented: ‘A feast for the senses, this is how daily life should always be, tasteful, stimulating, structured, and no pressure’.

The Cafe in the Stables was busy both days, and Kristyn Jill Carrolls vegetarian menu was a big hit with the visitors and by Saturday evening the larders were empty and we had to cook overnight to satisfy the demand on Sunday.

The Blanket, from the visitor survey draw, has been won by Mr J. Wormald from Llandeillo.  The Name the New Ale competition was won by Julie from the Felinfach Griffin for her excellent name ‘Stiltskin Gold’ congratulations to her, and I hope she enjoys wiling away the winter evenings with a fine pint. Many thanks to Waen Brewery for initiating this competition.

Review of A Festival of Colour by Wendy Freeman of Stratford upon Avon:

Fantastic venue, a perfect Autumn setting for exquisite textiles from around the world in beautiful grounds.

A highly recommended event, Wales was well represented with a wholesome selection of quality arts and crafts.  I learnt so much from the many stall holders, who eagerly discussed methods and techniques of various technical processes, represented with genuine enthusiasm, and shared expertise.

An absolute gift of an event, free lectures, films and workshops which were all stimulating and inspiring.  I knew nothing about Welsh Blankets and found the talk by Athene English both mesmerising and fascinating.  Certainly the Welsh Blanket has a secure place in the International Textile Market.

The artist Robert Macdonald talked generously, not only about his own work, but the legacy of other Welsh artists in the area.

A truely excellent weekend, bargain admission price and the joy of wonderful home cooking in the Cafe, which was very reasonably priced and extremely delicious. The event provided a haven of creativity and inspiring company; Wales and Penpont at its best.  Please do it again next year, as it is not to be missed!

Living Etc Nov issue FC

Living Ect Nov 2011

I am working flat out to put together our first Textile and Garden event. This Festival will combine the glories of garden autumnal beauty and textile colour. It is going to be held at Penpont House, a privately owned 17^th Century country house situated on the River Usk, with stunning gardens and grounds near Brecon, www.penpont.com.  This is a joint venture between Penpont and my shop, The Great English Outdoors

The Great English Outdoors is a shop based in Hay on Wye with a website, www.greatenglish.co.uk, specialising  in World textiles, in particular old and new Welsh Blankets.

At, The Festival of Colour, there will be a variety of specialist textile stands located within The Old Stables, trading and exhibiting all kinds of fabrics, cloth and clothing from around the World, along with jewellery, books and plants. We have worked really hard to make this event child friendly with lots of events and workshops for children which will be free of charge.

We have organized a programme of workshops, demonstrations, lectures and films throughout the weekend. Amongst those exhibiting, speaking and demonstrating will be:

JOHN GILLOW: renowned author and textile expert will be talking on world textiles. John has spent the last 35 years roaming across Asia and Africa collecting stunning examples of embroidery and weaving. ELIZABETH GIBBONS: lecturer at The Royal School of Needlework, sources antique textiles from around the globe, including hangings, rugs and unusual small pieces for example English and European lace embroideries. INGRID WAGNER: contemporary textile designer will be showcasing Big Knitting on her colourful stand. She holds the world record for knitting with the largest Needles ever, up to 1.2m long. Don’t miss it. Ingrid will be giving a visual and entertaining talk on Moroccan woven textiles, life, love, and couscous, as well as creative workshops. ROS PRICE JONES: will be exhibiting her stunning jewellery designs using semi-precious stones, Czech and Murano glass, and sterling silver. ATHENE ENGLISH: the Blanket Lady and owner of The Great English Outdoors will be unravelling the history of Welsh Blankets. PATRICIA DIGBY: head tutor of the Art department at Ruskin Mill, Stroud, will be hosting a wood block printing workshop/demonstration.

THE GARDENS contain many fine trees which will be in full autumn glory. Visitors are invited to walk through the grounds, discover the maze, topiary hedges and the walled kitchen gardens. Flag installations by Shona Watts will be specially erected for the Festival. Shona has exhibited around the world and at many of the major music festivals in the UK.

ART EXHIBITION: New works from the Penpont Artists. Featuring Robert Macdonald, Tessa Waite  and  Morag Colquhoun. This exhibition forms part of the Powys Arts Forum Month.

REFRESHMENTS (Most Importantly!): Homemade lunches and teas will be served all day from The Stable kitchens cooked with organic produce grown in Penpont’s Victorian walled gardens. The farm shop will be selling organic fruit, vegetables and plants from the Estate.

ADMISSION: £4.00 per adult, Children FREE.

 http://putthison.com/post/10203896614/for-50-you-can-buy-its-been-a-while-since-i

It was a lovely weekend….. again, so generously helped by the clement weather, which when it decided we had all had too much of a good thing, gave us an end of the day finale to remember!

This year went much better, and the event attracted many more people, though more could easily be accommodated.  It really is worth coming too, especially if you have kids that want to get”interactive”. There was so much Skill on offer, and so many craftspeople willing to share their knowledge, patience and time.

On my stand, once again, called Wool Works: The Great English Unwashed….. I had brisk business all the time selling all my second hand knits.

A teacher from Merthyr was my best customer who bought his whole school uniform from my stand.

Jim the ferret man, was here again, although Health and Safety had prevented him from allowing the public to handle his ferrets – spoil sports.

Kate with her wonderful working horses was one of the star attractions.  It was delightful to see a child of ten holding the long reins of an Ardennes horses weighing 3.4 ton.

Tools for Self Reliance were also at The Big Skill, with their range of refurbished second hand tools. They have successfully supplied a metal working workshop in Tanzania with our old tools,to such an extent that we now buy back the bill hooks etc that the Tanzanian workshop makes!

I spent most of my limited spare time, on the side of the river of course, and even tried my hand at Coracle Paddling!

And in the expert tuition of the Merthyr Angling Club who were giving their help and tuition to anyone wanting to try fly fishing, as well as supplying a free river guide to take anyone down the River Usk to actually catch fish! All of which I did, helped by Gareth, a memeber of  the Club.  What a treat it was to have someone changing the flies etc etc, and I learnt many new tricks, like micro fly fishing and fishing with a dry and a wet fly dropper.  It only took 20 mins to catch a fish, unlike my usual 1.5 hours.

My lasting memory will be that of a young girl, who sat for hours, with the fly tying expert on the stand Learning a New Craft.  The old and wise and the young and eager, coming together harmoniously, lost in deep concentration over the art of fly tying.

Looking forward to next year…

The Green Man Festival

The Great English Outdoors proudly presented their now well known Stall under the name of: WOOL WORKS

The sandwich board outside the stand read: Wool Works – with the Great English Unwashed

A Kaleidoscopic Cornucopia concoction of Wool Wear

Which is exactly what it was…… a wonderful selection of old wool clothing for sale.

Along side this The Crickhowell Guild of Spinners Weavers and Dyers gave a demonstration of spinning and knitting.

It was amazing how these stoic three ladies from the Guild, made their way onto the site, through endless security, they glided through the crowds and unloaded their zoo of spinning wheels and weaving materials.  Then, undaunted they set up shop with The Great English Outdoors in Einstein’s Fields

Anyway it was all a great success and even Charlotte Church called by again to see us and drove a very tough bargain for some of my finest knitwear.  Definitely in this season – Aran Sweaters.